Small changes, big difference!

I not only survived, but really enjoyed a social event on Saturday. It was the carnival. Lots of drinking was done by all (except me!) My husband and I were out with friends and watched the procession – floats, brass bands (and a bagpipes band) and Rose Queens – outside the pub, then we went over to the (crown green) bowling club where there was a bit of a fun fair. Later on, back to the pub. A good eight hours of a day out!

I was truly astonished at how well it all went. I’ve struggled to get on with one of the people we were with, in the last year or so. I’ve written about it on here. But this weekend, something just lifted, the person’s whole attitude was completely different, and everything seemed to click into place. We were somehow both slightly more able to understand each other, and that was enough to make a huge difference. It totally blew me away!!

That wouldn’t have happened, had I still been drinking, I can pretty much guarantee it. I’m so happy I am sober, happy it feels easier and easier to enjoy social gatherings like this. I mean, being an introvert and all, I’m having to learn what’s the best strategy for me. I tell my husband beforehand that I might leave early. Being around so many people for a long time tires me out, but it’s easier to deal with if I’m prepared for it. The next day I try to plan in some quality time alone if I can. Which is what I did on Sunday, and it helped immensely to re-energise me. I think I’m finally getting the hang of it 🙂

I did notice a few times, there were lulls in conversation, and after the fact I realise I could have said more, asked more questions. But I’m not beating myself up about it – like many things, this is still a work in progress. But progress I have done! Do you remember the first post I wrote? I was terrified about going to a social thing. With kids, alcohol, and possibly people I didn’t know. Well, circumstances on Saturday were similar. My husband even wandered off a few times, like he usually does. Ordinarily I would have been anxious and felt abandoned, but not so at the carnival this weekend! Nope, I went to get candy floss (cotton candy?) – I just had to have some – and shared it with our friends’ little boy. Then I had a go on Hook-a-Duck and got myself a prize (a teddy bear in the end – unfortunately the minions were mouldy!) And I just enjoyed everyone’s company. I genuinely think they enjoyed mine, too – even though I was a bit quiet, even though I was completely sober. The important thing is, I was being thoroughly me.

So, I’m happy. Which is a direct result of getting sober, and continuing to be sober for eleven months. It has helped me to be more me, and life feels so much better that way 🙂

Anyone who is struggling out there, or not sure whether sobriety is worth it… I promise you, it soooooo is! Yes, there are hard days and tough times (that’s life I suppose, whether you’re drinking or sober), but sticking with it through all of that, not giving up – it’s worth it a million times over. I’m a bit stunned actually, how much my life has changed – from the inside out. A subtle difference on the face of it, but really a seismic shift in comparison to how I was before I quit.

28 days to go to one year!


4 thoughts on “Small changes, big difference!”

  1. I like that you are counting down to a year!
    I think I might have to do that!
    I agree that the shifts have been subtle and yet huge!
    I am an extrovert, but I am finding I too am more my real self now that I am not drinking.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s brill. The amazement comes through in the writing. I’m sat here grinning a mile wide for ya. Yay! etc. Crack on, you’re really firing on all cylinders.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi,
    It’s like being an introvert means we’re compelled to drink to make up for that feeling of not being social enough.
    But no one else is social enough either! That idea of being enough of anything – it’s just not true – we are enough right now! God, it sounds like I’m going to start screaming it out loud right here YOU ARE ENOUGH! I AM ENOUGH! WE ARE ENOUGH!
    anyway – must stop this…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes! We are enough! I think that learning who we are and how to express the best in ourselves is valuable for both introverts and extraverts. I used to think that alcohol helped me to fit in with groups of people, but in reality it made me feel more anxious and alienated than ever.
      Btw, have you read ‘quiet’ by Susan Cain? It’s a must read for all introverts everywhere. Love it!

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Dancing Your Way To Fertility

Had enough of hearing ‘no you are not pregnant?’ The information you need to beat infertility…a hand to hold on your hardest of days.

The IVF Survivor

Staying sane and hopeful after long term IVF and loss

Lovin · Life · Fully

Finding the everyday joys in God's creative plan for us

infertile me.

Infertility: The journey, emotions and ramblings

Finding a Sober Miracle

A woman's quest for one year of sobriety

A life without peas

An IVF journey

The Unplanned Plan

Documenting this crazy IVF journey

Southern Fried Ovaries

The story of a Mississippi couple trying to conceive

The Stickles

Tales of marriage, twins, infertility, and other everday hilarity

The IVF Piggy Bank

Test Tube Trials and In Vitro Victories

Helping the Stork

One couple's journey of high AMH and PCOS

Are We There Yet

a nerd girl's infertility journey



then i look up at the sky...

coffee, wine, and infertility. just a little blog about my life

The Thin Place

The Thin Place, Where We Experience the Sufficiency of Grace

Different Shores

Observations about middle-aged life without kids


The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still. -Exodus 14:14


Our everlasting journey

Tales of a 30 Year Old Nothing

Navigating my thirties is not what I thought it would be

Waiting for Baby Bird Ministries

infertility, miscarriage and pregnancy loss


Living with Premature Ovary Failure in my 30s

Finding My Freedom

getting rid of the booze...

The Everyday Addict

Hi! I’m Ashley and I am just your average everyday addict! Recovery is a new adventure that is hard, but it CAN also be fun and exciting! I created this blog to share my experience with addiction, my perspective as a youth in recovery, and the joys of my recovery. Clean & sober since 10/27/2008!

%d bloggers like this: