Sober Introvert

I did buy the ‘I Quit Sugar’ book yesterday. I’ve only flicked through so far because I was finishing off the Jason Vale book. What was I saying about instant vs delayed gratification?!

Jason tells me that I shouldn’t feel like I am missing out on anything at all now that I’ve quit drinking. He says that alcohol is a drug that made false promises, and never helped me to relax, enjoy the company of friends, or celebrate. I do see that alcohol didn’t add anything to my life (only anxiety, lethargy and hangovers), and I have been feeling great about not drinking. I don’t miss it.

I do feel as though I’m letting the side down a bit (as far as Vale’s message goes) because I’m going to a wedding on Saturday – my husband and I are all-day guests – and I’m a bit apprehensive. I should be feeling exhilarated and free from the prison of alcohol, and have more confidence than ever. Erm…

I’m so happy that I won’t be drinking. I used to hate that ‘all day drinking’ thing anyway. I never know how to ‘pace’ myself, so the potential for a ruined day (a ruined me?) is always there. But I also feel unsure of how I will cope without drinking. Vale thinks I should be more confident than this. But he’s probably an extrovert anyway, if the way he talks about going out and socialising is anything to go by. Whereas I am very much an introvert, so I’m not naturally comfortable around huge crowds of people.

I’m very happy, then, that all the focus will be on the couple themselves, not me! My role I suppose, is to be there and celebrate with them, eat some lovely food, try to look nice, and be as chatty as possible with our friends. Belle advised planning what I will drink beforehand, and possibly leaving early. I might plan a very big treat for the next day, too 🙂

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4 thoughts on “Sober Introvert”

  1. Can imagine that a full day of watching other people drink can be overwhelming. 2 Months earlier I would have drank not to feel overwhelmed. I am guessing that practising existing in situations without alcohol is part of the sobering up process.

    I am not much of a party person but the other day on a birthday party I noticed that most people are quite happy to speak about themselves Sorry to say that was new to me because I have always been ranting when boozed up. 😦 .

    You can also look up tips on google on ‘small talk’. That is a cool survival tool. I have practised it with Debra Fine’s book when profesionally going places. It is actually online digital: http://msport04.free.fr/Small%20Talk.pdf Enjoy! I should read it again, letting the crazy out too often momentarily.

    On feeling happy. I actually practise feeling happy. Yes, I know that sounds stupid. But I do/did. Jason says it is important. He knows his shit so I sit down an practise being happy. I would/will sit still and try to feel happy that I quit. If I don’t feel happy I try to see what is bothering me and solve that or sweep complaints and selfpitty away. It worked for me. There is a happy switch. Problem is that problems and worries create fog so the happy switch becomes invisible. That’s why I remind myself at the end of every post ‘Happy that I quit’, so I know I can still find the switch. Hope this bit of magic works if I get in real trouble too. 🙂

    You’ll be fine. Love to hear what you plan for yourself the day after 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for the tips – and the link to that pdf, I will be sure to read it!
      I think I’m starting to locate my own happy switch now. I love that metaphor. Yesterday I had a feeling, like changing my perspective, that made me feel happier. Nothing had changed – just the way I felt.
      Happy that I quit, happy that you quit 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I think you will be surprised at how little most of the people drink during the day.
    It’s great you are prepping in advance. In the end, unless you are in the wedding party, leave if need be. Take a walk, a drive or just go home. You need to protect yourself and put your needs first.
    Have a good week. A treat for the next day is a good idea.sometimes making it through a big event can make a normal day feel hard.

    Liked by 1 person

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